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No more room for jail tats on ibis inmates

9 Jun



Mozart and Coltrane hit the media: Ibis resilience

24 Nov

So It Goes: Ibis resilience by Linda Muller



My brother has had to cope with a bit of disappointment lately.

As the co-founder of the Bald Ibis Retribution Democrats (Ibis) party, he was hopeful of recognition at the forthcoming elections.

His is the political commentary of Mozart and Coltrane, both ibis nonsensical satirists with plenty to say about local and political issues.  Mozart and Coltrane stand for many things, but their strongest platform is that which is heavily littered with issues producing a  greater amount of rubbish.

It makes for an interesting family dinner party conversation.

Mozart and Coltaine, two ibises born from the dirty ibis clan of the Gold Coast, stand up for bird migration and  support dual citizenship for politicians, regularly quoting Tony Ibbit, Malcolm Ternbill and Canbill Newbird as reliable sources for material.

The unlikely feathered pair of ibis idealogists looks short term at issues, favouring for example a new cruise ship terminal for the rubbish it will most likely produce, despite uncertainty of a healthy future for birdlife.  If they were able to picket, their signs would ask that Do Not Feed the Ibis signs be abolished in picnic areas.

They also throw out the challenge to find a children’s lunch box they can’t hack, expressing their joy at children who carelessly leave lunch boxes unattended and often open for ibis to enjoy.

Most recently, Mozart and Coltrane visited the Birkdale refuse station as part of their political circuit, and my brother tells me they were inspired by the spectacular view to practice their mating ritual.

“The eagle may have been circling above, but we were there impressing ibis women with our fossick and forage footwork. It is no surprise that our dump odour is so exciting to ibis hens.  We especially find that when we visit Logan dump, but our feathers get a bit fluffed when we find some of the human species there are also attracted,” Mozart said.

Mozart said he believed the ibis behaviour was a self made conservation success story.

“Threaten the wetlands and it brings us out to the picnic areas and the schools and those al fresco restaurants. Seeing us around the bins makes people realise it’s important to get out,” he said.

“We did coin the term bin juice and it’s been tough watching others take the credit.  We didn’t think to patent it at the time.  And while we’re talking disappointment, we are still waiting for the paperwork from the Commonwealth Games.  Ibis for mascot,” he said.

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Tribute to John Clarke… Drier than an ibis in a drought

10 Apr

John Clarke 2Sadly I admit my love of John Dawe’s comedy up until I heard about his death this morning has been random.

I couldn’t even say which channel I’ve seen him on. But the odd occasion that I chanced upon his brief appearances on TV I stopped there and laughed a lot.

I remember his dry wit and not-even-attempts at impersonations of drongos from today’s news, events and issues.

He was an inspiration to Mozart and Coltrane’s political satire, though I’m not sure that he would be proud to hear that.

He broke down the barrier between the arts and journalism, as he says John Lennon did in that song “I heard the news today oh boy…”

Here him talk about what made him creative and watch some Clarke and Dawe on TV – I mean Youtube.

Vale John Clarke – died of natural causes hiking in the Grampians too young.



3 Apr



Friendship is like a bin

15 Mar



Annual General Meeting of the Ibis Bird Council to discuss anti-ibis sentiment in the community

10 Feb




Australian White Ibis using its beak on the oyster flats

2 Feb

Son of Ibis and the hipsters at the Burleigh Single Fin from Psalm 69 of the Ibis Bible of Waste Recycling

13 Jan

20170107_055621-2The hipsters of Burleigh sat on the hill

Imbibing the bread and wine of God

As Parko won the single fin contest.

The rabble of heathen hipsters cheered the locals.

The son of ibis walked onto the hill

Decrying (Aaaarping) the money lenders in the temple where the tinnies were sold

He overturned the tables searching for scraps in the temple of God

The son of ibis stood on an esky and shouted out that the hipsters were worshipping a false god,

Even if they had very appropriate beards

“You will spend eternity with everlasting sunburn and your waxed mustaches shall explode in flames and tickle your nostrils along with the bubbles of boutique beers.”

20170109_175151-2Then clouds parted and the sun shone on the Twin Towers of the Babel of Ibis

20170107_055514-2The Son of Ibis said “Behold”

And the hipsters on the hill and ibis stalking for scraps among the hipsters, eskies, blankets and buns beheld the vision of the bins.

The bounty of the blessed bins shone with the light of God.

The ibis repented and kneeled before the bins of the lord

And it was good.


Ibis win dirtiest bird competition

19 Nov

Mozart and Coltrane have learned that comedian Ben Thomas has awarded Ibis the winner of Australia’s dirtiest bird competition. Honk and Aaaarrp out to Ben Thomasab_1

Photo from SBS

Check it out here


May the Ibis of Joy bless you

25 Aug

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