Tag Archives: Coltrane
Audio

Mozart and Coltrane hit the media: Ibis resilience

24 Nov

So It Goes: Ibis resilience by Linda Muller

http://www.redlandcitybulletin.com.au/story/5043486/so-it-goes-ibis-resilience/

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My brother has had to cope with a bit of disappointment lately.

As the co-founder of the Bald Ibis Retribution Democrats (Ibis) party, he was hopeful of recognition at the forthcoming elections.

His is the political commentary of Mozart and Coltrane, both ibis nonsensical satirists with plenty to say about local and political issues.  Mozart and Coltrane stand for many things, but their strongest platform is that which is heavily littered with issues producing a  greater amount of rubbish.

It makes for an interesting family dinner party conversation.

Mozart and Coltaine, two ibises born from the dirty ibis clan of the Gold Coast, stand up for bird migration and  support dual citizenship for politicians, regularly quoting Tony Ibbit, Malcolm Ternbill and Canbill Newbird as reliable sources for material.

The unlikely feathered pair of ibis idealogists looks short term at issues, favouring for example a new cruise ship terminal for the rubbish it will most likely produce, despite uncertainty of a healthy future for birdlife.  If they were able to picket, their signs would ask that Do Not Feed the Ibis signs be abolished in picnic areas.

They also throw out the challenge to find a children’s lunch box they can’t hack, expressing their joy at children who carelessly leave lunch boxes unattended and often open for ibis to enjoy.

Most recently, Mozart and Coltrane visited the Birkdale refuse station as part of their political circuit, and my brother tells me they were inspired by the spectacular view to practice their mating ritual.

“The eagle may have been circling above, but we were there impressing ibis women with our fossick and forage footwork. It is no surprise that our dump odour is so exciting to ibis hens.  We especially find that when we visit Logan dump, but our feathers get a bit fluffed when we find some of the human species there are also attracted,” Mozart said.

Mozart said he believed the ibis behaviour was a self made conservation success story.

“Threaten the wetlands and it brings us out to the picnic areas and the schools and those al fresco restaurants. Seeing us around the bins makes people realise it’s important to get out,” he said.

“We did coin the term bin juice and it’s been tough watching others take the credit.  We didn’t think to patent it at the time.  And while we’re talking disappointment, we are still waiting for the paperwork from the Commonwealth Games.  Ibis for mascot,” he said.

See more on mozartandcoltrane.wordpress.com

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Audio

Australian White Ibis using its beak on the oyster flats

2 Feb
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‘AARRRPPP OUT’ to Honorary Ibis birthday girl Lizzy Muller

13 May

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This “Aaarrpp Out” Happy birthday to you. Acting like a real ibis in this photo though not as deft as a real ibis at hoovering up icing from the bowl. On this day you join your brother Joe and I name you Lizzy Muller as a member of The Order of Australian Ibis. May your singing always be as beautiful as the Aaarrpps Taw Aws and Unks of the Ibis Choir at the dump.

 

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Mozart’s Grandma’s old sayings

27 Feb

An ibis in the lake is worth two in the bin…
You can take the ibis out of the lake, but you can’t take the lake out of an ibis…
Once an ibis always an ibis…
It takes an ibis to know one…
An ibis never falls far from the tree…

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Dreamworld Ibis

26 Feb

Honk out to John for sending this one in of a very cheeky ibis at cafe at DreamworldDreamworld ibis

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Coltrane’s doctor takes his bloodpressure

7 Feb
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Ibis last meal on deathrow

3 Dec

Mozart is a worrier. He can’t sleep because he is wondering what he would eat for his last meal if he was on death row. So he wakes up Coltrane and they look at every possible option together.

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Dirty ibis ride the G

3 Jul
Gold Coast Dirty Ibis, Mozart and Coltrane, catch a tram because they had a big night on medical waste at the Gold Coast Hospital. They feel too hungover to fly and too lazy to walk to the park at Cascade Gardens to sleep off their hangovers and steal some greasy food.

Gold Coast Dirty Ibis, Mozart and Coltrane, catch a tram because they had a big night on medical waste at the Gold Coast Hospital. They feel too hungover to fly and too lazy to walk to the park at Cascade Gardens to sleep off their hangovers and steal some greasy food.

Everyone is asking, “When can I ride the G?”
“When is the G going to start taking passengers?”
“When is the official launch day for the G?”
“When does the G start running”
“Why hasn’t the G started yet?”
Everyone but ibis want to know the answer to this question, because ibis have been riding the G for months and humans have been banned.
Dirty Ibis call it the Ibis Tram.

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Ibis group SSPIT protests ugly port plans

9 Apr
Mozart and Coltrane, a local comedy ibis duo, want to SSPIT on council plans to wreck the Seaway with a big fat port

Mozart and Coltrane, a local comedy ibis duo, want to SSPIT on council plans to wreck the Seaway with a big fat port

PRESS RELEASE

April 9, 2014

Stop Spit Port Ibis Team

Two lovely ibis have gone public about their disgust over plans to build a big rotten port in the seaway at the Southport Spit.

Mozart and Coltrane Ibis say they represent all of the beautiful Broadwater water birds, marine animals and plants when they say they don’t want a stupid port for a stupid love boat on the Gold Coast.

“We rarely get involved in anything but sanitation issues but the garbage about this port has gone on too long, which is why we formed a protest group called “Stop Spit Port Ibis Team” or SSPIT for short.

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“Bugger the bloody Spit Port idiots,” Mozart says.

“They can stick their filthy port idea up their cloaca,” says Coltrane.

The rubber fetish ibis say they haven’t done anything ethical for a long time, but they have been waiting for the right issue to bring out good old fashioned ibis ethics.

SSPIT says they want people to call the dirty port idea by a name that tells you how revolting it is, which is why the ibis have dubbed it the Spit Port.

“If a cruise ship ever comes near this place we are going to fill up on as much junk food and festering garbage dump juice as we can eat and spray that thing all day and all night,” Coltrane says.

SSPIT say they know that the awful port will bring more garbage for them to eat to the seaway but they care too much about the conserving the area to be motivated by pure self interest.

“We normally only think of ourselves but this is different. This is a marine garden of nature on the Gold Coast’s doorstep, it’s too valuable for our kids to risk,” SSPIT say.

Media Contact: Mozart Ibis 1800cloaca
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Dump ducks

25 Mar

Juxtaposed between the stench of the dump and the Australian bush, Mozart and Coltrane’s minds connect and they realise they truly are “Dirty Ibis”.
Stay tuned the episode “Ambassador Ibis” is in post production and due very very soon aaaarrpp, uuuurrrkkk, taw aw.
Photo by Mic Smith
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